Continuing how I got to this point

I promise to be less long-winded this time around...I can be a bit wordsy :) And I also promise to keep it all in the same font (HA!) I'm usually pretty good with technology but it may take me some time to get this blog thing looking how I want it and functioning properly. So, anyone that wants to give a sista a hand would not be turned away!
Anyway! Going back to getting to this point....about mid-year last year everyone that I knew was turning up pregnant...all 3 of my sisters, one of my closest friends, all of the goochie girls (there was a group of 6 of us girls in college and we named ourselves that but that group can be talked about another time ;) and 2 of my 3 sisters-in-law. One thought that came to me was "Really God, REALLY???" Why were all of these important women in my life getting pregnant within months of me losing the twins....it was painful for sure! I prayed a lot that God would reveal Himself and give us some sign that hope wasn't lost and that maybe, just maybe, we could still have a large family. God answered that pray because I found out I was pregnant mid-November but we lost that baby on December 5th.
I don't say any of this evoke any sympathy or pity. I am only sharing all of this so that you can see the path and its struggles and to see what a transformation Christ has done in me and in my life. I really see a new 'me' emerging from the rubble, if you will. I hate that it took something so gut-wrenching and heartbreaking to get me to this state. I truly believe that had this not happened then I wouldn't be where I am right now in my walk and relationship with God. It took the miscarriages to make me utterly vulnerable, weak and broken; and in that state is where God really started molding me and making me into the woman that He wants me to be. As horribly debilitating as this past year has been I can honestly say that I wouldn't choose to change it. Do I miss our 3 precious babies? OF COURSE...that isn't even up for discussion! However, if this is the path that had to be taken for God to mold me and change me and make me into His image then I wouldn't change it. As long as He is glorified then it was all worth it!! What an awesome God we serve for me to be able to say all of this and mean it!!!
To completely answer how we got to this point right now of knowing that adopting was what God had for us is pretty simple....we were contacted by my sister about possibly adopting a child and God brought it back to the fore-front of our minds. It didn't work out to adopt the child my sister told me about and so we asked each other where to go next and what the point of contemplating the adoption of the child was if we weren't going to be able to do so and we talked and both agreed we felt God leading us toward pursuing adoption this time. Last year it was the financial end of things that tied Travis up, and I appreciate that in him because I am very emotion and don't always look at all of the big picture. So, now we both feel lead to adopt and have been approved to work with Bethany Christian Services.